My Own Secret

Ok, so I haven't actually read The Secret, but from what I know about it...well...I just think it's dangerous to believe that wishing really hard for something will magically make it happen. Nothing is quite that simple. What I do think, however, is that positive (and negative) thinking can have a powerful impact on life and that once you're on the right track, the good stuff really does seem to snowball. I try to focus on my good energy because I truly believe that it can bring good energy back to me. When I relax about forcing my happiness, and instead watch my words, my attitude, and my actions, I allow the good things to enter my life.

When I broke up with The Liar, about 18 months ago, I was in a bad place. My breaking up with him was actually the best thing I had going for me at the time. But I had to deal with the fact that I had wasted three years of my life with someone I didn't trust or respect and, in the course of those three years, I had driven myself into a financial shitstorm. I was angry at myself (and beyond broke), so something had to change. It was time to refocus on the positive. All of the techniques I had neglected during that relationship (affirmations, visualizations, etc.), were part of my routine again.

Fast forward to today. It's taken time, but I really feel like everything is going great in my life. I am doing better than expected at work, and while it's not my dream job, it's a whole lot more than a lot of people have. Plus, I get to work across the hall from my mom! I still have equity in my home, despite having a first and second mortgage on it. Due to a recent windfall, I will be paying off my car eight months early. I am setting aside money every month for all of our future plans...a new car for Jersey, a wedding, babies, and a new house. Obviously, those aren't all going to be happening immediately, but it feels so great to have a plan and the ability to be financially ready when the plan unfolds.

Then, there's Jersey. I am unbelievably happy with her by my side. I know all relationships take a certain amount of effort, but it's wonderful when it doesn't feel like hard work. Being with her is the most natural thing in the world and I love her very much. She has been somewhat stressed lately because her job search has dragged out for over a year and she's had to work bartending jobs in the meantime. I know she's as eager to move forward with our goals as I am, so imagine my happiness this week when she started a new job about which she's very excited! It's a part time position for now, but it's in juvenile probation, which is ultimately what she wants to do. The way I see it, it can't hurt to have your foot in the door while you're still stuck in the middle of all the loooooong physical/written/psychological exams, background checks, interviews, etc. I hope she'll learn a lot and meet the right people, so that her career will grow from here. Yay!

So, while I sit here with all sorts of goodness around me, I will scatter some out to all of you. Take it as you need it, and then send some back out to others. It may not be magic, but it's amazingly powerful.