Playing Dumb

This certainly isn't a new thing.  In fact, my parents very specifically warned me against doing it when I was a child.  Yet, as I see it more and more among adults in my life, I want to scream.  Playing dumb is dumb.

When I was young, school was my thing.  I mean, I got great grades and was mocked (bullied?) for being "Little Miss Perfect."  I wasn't athletic or pretty or anything else particularly outstanding...but I did well in school.  Obviously, my parents saw enough of it to warn me that I should be proud of being smart.  They did not want me to hide it for the sake of pleasing others, or to make myself more "acceptable" to the insecure.  So, I embraced it, surrounded myself with good friends, and let it be.

Now, I see women around me (more than a few) who seem to have made playing dumb a way of life.  Perhaps I'm more sensitive to it because I was explicitly told NOT to behave that way, but it bothers me.  Actually, it scares me a little because I can't totally tell whether they are smart women who are playing dumb or whether they are just women who were never encouraged to be smart in the first place.

Before I go any further, I'd like to clarify a couple of things.  First, I'm not sitting up here on my high horse and saying that I've never played dumb.  However, when I've done it, it's been an occasional, strategic manipulation in order to achieve a specific goal.  I've never used it as a day-to-day "this is who I am."  Second, I'm not criticizing people who weren't lucky enough to have my parents, my education, my experiences, etc.  We all have different talents, measured in different ways.  Some people have book smarts, others have street smarts, plenty have a combination of both.  All of that is awesome and I certainly don't think I'm above anyone else in that regard.  This post isn't about women who hate reading, suck at math, or have crappy grammar.  This is about women who act helpless, so that other people will do the heavy lifting of their lives.

It freaks me out to see professionals shrug their shoulders, bat their doe eyes, pout, and use just enough of a whine to make people jump up and do things for them, to make decisions on their behalf.  The pathetic "I don't know...help me" look shakes my very core.  Why is this okay to them?  When did it become acceptable to let other people pull the strings? If a generation of these women are now raising daughters of their own, what the hell will the future hold?  We were given a backbone for a reason; we need to stand tall. Asking for help when we truly need it is a sign of strength.  Asking for help when we don't, is a weakness.